Gathering Connections
My father’s parents, his five siblings, and their families lived up and down the Eastern Seaboard during the years I grew up in New Jersey. We always gathered together for Thanksgiving, often in Washington D.C., to meet in the middle of our geographical spread. The family connections provided a magnetism that drew us together, while different perspectives and experiences tumbled out of our cars like baggage at the end of our long journeys. That baggage enlivened our holiday weekend, sparking debates, discussions, disputes, and long walks with the dogs.
Gathered together, the generations of my family had conflicts over parenting practices, the merits of vegetarianism, the integrity of the political leaders of the time, women’s rights, wartime practices, the quality of the quarterbacking, table manners, and more.
As children in these spaces, we were exposed to ideas and beliefs that were starkly different from those held by our parents. We were steeped in an abundance of, what we call today, polarizing perspectives. Yet, these were ideas and beliefs that were held by people we loved and by people who loved us. This made us curious. This made us listen. This made us probe. This made us wonder. We developed the habits of mind to put to use when we met in the middle, habits of mind that we packed in our baggage and carried home.
This reflection of mine isn’t about the merits of Thanksgiving. In fact, some will say, with their own good reason, that Thanksgiving is an overrated holiday, “it’s just a meal.” Rather, this message is intended to address our shared desire as a Live Oak School community to raise changemakers who are skilled and capable and powerful in their future, especially in polarized spaces. It’s a reminder to help our children use proximity to gain understanding, to gather connections that expand their perspectives, and to seek opportunities to meet in the middle. A shared meal could very well be the right setting to start.
In gratitude,
Virginia
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